In the eyes of our friends, taking care of children should be rather casual.
For instance, when having a meal, we would give Xiaoqian a bowl with some dishes in it.
Then let him eat by himself or with a spoon.
But he is not very flexible with the spoon. Sometimes when he wants to use it himself, we just let him use it.
If you don’t use it, it’s okay. It doesn’t matter if it gets a little dirty.
It’s just that cleaning will be a bit more troublesome.
Just wash it and it will be clean.
So, the last time I had a meal at a dumpling restaurant.
The landlady saw me and let the child grab the noodles to eat by himself.
She told me:
Actually, this is quite good. Why did I insist on forcing my son to eat with a spoon back then?
She said that her son is now in his teens. When he was two or three years old, he was not allowed to grab food to eat.
For this reason, I often make the child cry.
Yes, there are too many rules and regulations in our minds. Not only do we restrain ourselves, but we also often have internal conflicts.
Sometimes it even drains the child.
For instance, when a child is having a meal and wants to say something, before they can finish speaking, the parents will quickly say:
“Just eat well and don’t talk about anything.” “
Why not ask the child what they want to say?
Sometimes the child sits cross-legged on the floor, leaning against the sofa and reading a book with great enthusiasm.
And then he would keep muttering:
“Pay attention to your posture! You don’t look like you’re reading a book at all!”
At this moment, the child was interrupted by his parents, who suddenly pulled him out of the wonderful state of reading and threw a bucket of cold water on him.
In fact, there’s no need to be too obsessed.
These years, Little Fish has been reading at home. Sometimes she lies on her side on the sofa, and sometimes she even leans on the bed to read.
Of course, I know that looking at things like this for too long can easily damage one’s eyesight.
But I’ll still try my best not to disturb him. Let’s talk about it after he finishes reading.
When reading books, what’s more important is to check the lighting. If it’s too dim, turn on the light.
Sometimes children are so absorbed in reading that they forget all these.
Squeeze children’s study time
Caring too much about children
Struggle with your child’s shortcomings
It’s all because of the limitations of parents’ thinking
Only by breaking through the limitations of thinking can one be flexible and adaptable
Wang Yangming’s “Collected Instructions for Practical Use” takes you through
Emerge from confusion, understand the world, and break through adversity
“Collected Instructions” : Wang Yangming’s Wisdom for Cultivating the Mind
In addition to being guided by good teachers, there is also a learning companion community service guarantee. The number of places is limited, and the first 100 people can study for free
In fact, no matter how young a child is, they all have their own ways of playing and ideas.
Because they are independent individuals, not vassals of their parents.
At the amusement park, children of seven or eight years old were chasing each other and playing the game of stealing oil.
Two or three-year-old kids are also running and playing on the slide with their friends.
Every time I slid down, I would excitedly show it off to my friends.
Xiao Qian, who is over two years old, is just such a child.
To show himself off to a boy a little younger than him.
After sliding down the slide, he didn’t rush down but jumped down instead.
Because the height was not estimated properly and I exerted too much force, I lost my balance and fell flat on the ground directly.
Fortunately, he was small in size. He quickly got up and was beaming as if nothing had happened.
At this point, I will check if he is injured and then not care about him anymore.
Let him keep playing at his own pace.
As long as there is no major danger, we just need to watch from the side.
The wisest thing for parents to do is not to disturb their children.
Some parents will keep nagging:
“Climbing too high!” “
“Running too fast.” In fact, the child was just running a little to catch up with another child.
“Danger, danger!” It has become a catchphrase.
Hold the child firmly in your hand, so that the child can only play obediently within the circle drawn by the adults.
But have you noticed that only when children are in their own world and at their own pace can they have that kind of happiness from the bottom of their hearts?
When we grow up, where will we still have such smiles and crazy energy?
Admit your child’s ordinariness, and you won’t always be “disappointed”.
To be honest, if you lower your “expectations” of your children a little, you won’t be so disappointed or anxious.
For instance, when it comes to playing Go, I used to think that Little Fish would be very good.
But I failed the grading test several times. At first, I was very anxious and had no idea what went wrong.
Later on, I got used to it. Maybe his talent was limited.
He had a great time playing by himself and was happy even if he lost.
I think it’s fine too, so I won’t mind.
Anyway, he won’t follow the path of a professional chess player.
Let’s talk about playing badminton recently.
I just want him to be as long as a ball.
We’re not good at basketball or football, and we haven’t played table tennis either.
I’m only good at badminton myself, so I thought I’d take him to practice.
Exercise to lose some weight. In the future, I can also play badminton with a friend.
But the result was that my mouth was dry and I demonstrated until I was exhausted.
But there’s still no progress.
Several times I was so angry that I didn’t want to fight anymore.
Later on, I thought to myself, isn’t serving and receiving the ball also practice?
Well, that’s it. Although it’s boring, I can still make progress bit by bit.
Don’t set so many goals, nor do you need to ask so many whys.
Hey, thinking this way, one feels much more at ease.
The anxiety is gone, and no matter what the child does, I can’t stand it anymore.
Many people have doubts: Don’t waste children’s energy on trivial matters.
But the formation of many habits is made up of one small thing after another.
For instance, the formation of living habits such as brushing teeth well and dressing properly.
Each one of them is a trivial matter.
The same is true of learning.
Write well, take good notes, tidy up your books and develop good study habits.
It seems that one small thing after another is the place that tests us, isn’t it?
However, we still need to manage what should be managed, and where it is necessary to educate children, we must do so.
For instance, when a child is kicking the screen in a cinema or playing in an amusement park, they might suddenly bump into the puppeteers on a whim.
Cause damage to the equipment and injuries to the staff.
Some parents even say that such matters are “minor issues” because the children are not sensible.
In fact, this is no small matter; it’s a “big deal”. If parents don’t teach their children, it’s their dereliction of duty.
Children were not taught to respect public order and did not learn to respect others.
In the process of raising children, whether to manage or not, and how to manage?
It is a process of constantly seeking the “scale”.
During this process, parents grow together with their children.
So, don’t “overexert” your children on trivial matters.
Respect children, make the family atmosphere more relaxed, and let both children and yourself live a more carefree and happy life.
It’s actually quite good, right?