A person’s life will experience many separations from their mother, some of which are temporary and will come back after leaving; Some are eternal, never to be seen again after leaving.
Birth is both a physical birth and the first separation from the mother. From the warm and comfortable uterus of my mother, through a difficult and dangerous labor process, to the bright, noisy, and unpredictable external world, many stimuli are unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and even dangerous. This process is like a bird breaking its shell or a butterfly breaking its cocoon, although painful, it is the beginning of a life as an independent individual.
The second separation from the mother may be when the mother leaves home to work, or more likely when the child leaves home to attend kindergarten. Strangers, unfamiliar environments, and unfamiliar rules all require children to adapt independently, learn the identity of “student” from scratch, and achieve the transition of individuals from family roles to social roles.
The third separation from my mother may be living away from home in high school, attending university after the college entrance examination, or entering society to make a living independently. From the annoyance of having a mother involved in everything, to the freedom to leave the mold, to the loss and exhaustion of facing food, daily life, and the warmth of human relationships alone, without nagging, and far away from the warmth of family. This is a necessary stage for everyone to mature: taking care of oneself, managing oneself, in order to truly become an independent individual.
The separation from my mother once again was finding a lifelong partner, getting married, and establishing my own family. At the moment of the wedding, why do our parents feel so sad? We also have many emotions, because this moment is a farewell to our past identity and a true adulthood. From then on, the most important position in our hearts changed from mother to lover. I can understand my mother’s loss and reluctance at that moment, but it also fulfilled her most important responsibility.
Some people refer to marriage as a psychological birth of a person, and there is some truth to it. This is like physiological birth. No matter how much a mother loves her child, she will not keep them in her womb forever. Instead, she will deliver them at the right time, allowing them to leave their control and embrace their own life.
The following separation is a series of separations from the relationship with the mother, some are straightforward, some are dragging on, and some are simply entangled and make the chicken and dog restless.
The final separation is to bid farewell to my mother forever. Whoever walks ahead, this moment will come sooner or later. At this moment, our thoughts on which is precious and which is light in life may be different from before.